"I feel sorry for people who don't drink. When they wake up,
that's the best they feel all day."
W.C. Fields
----- Original Message -----
From: "WPG" <wpgottes@worldnet.att.net>
To: <dakota-truck@buffnet.net>
Sent: Saturday, September 23, 2000 7:40 AM
Subject: DML: Beer Troubleshooting... Tailgate subject
> Subject: Beer Troubleshooting
>
> SYMPTOM: Feet cold and wet.
> FAULT: Glass being held at incorrect angle.
>
> SYMPTOM: Feet warm and wet.
> FAULT: Improper bladder control.
>
> SYMPTOM: Beer unusually pale and tasteless.
> FAULT: Glass empty.
>
> SYMPTOM: Opposite wall covered with fluorescent lights.
> FAULT: You have fallen over backward.
>
> SYMPTOM: Mouth contains cigarette butts.
> FAULT: You have fallen forward.
>
> SYMPTOM: Beer tasteless, front of your shirt is wet.
> FAULT: Mouth not open, or glass applied to wrong part of face.
>
> SYMPTOM: Floor blurred.
> FAULT: You are looking through bottom of empty glass.
>
> SYMPTOM: Floor moving.
> FAULT: You are being carried out.
>
> SYMPTOM: Room seems unusually dark.
> FAULT: Bar has closed.
>
> SYMPTOM: Taxi suddenly takes on colorful aspect and textures.
> FAULT: Beer consumption has exceeded personal limitations.
>
> SYMPTOM: Everyone looks up to you and smiles.
> FAULT: You are dancing on the table.
>
> SYMPTOM: Beer is crystal-clear.
> FAULT: It's water. Somebody is trying to sober you up.
>
> SYMPTOM: Hands hurt, nose hurts, mind unusually clear.
> FAULT: You have been in a fight.
>
> SYMPTOM: Don't recognize anyone, don't recognize the room you're in.
> FAULT: You've wandered into the wrong party.
>
> SYMPTOM: Your singing sounds distorted.
> FAULT: The beer is too weak.
>
> SYMPTOM: Don't remember the words to the song.
> FAULT: Beer is just right
>
> WPG
>
> By the way sold the 93 yesterday... Now I can drive my R/T!
>
>
This archive was generated by hypermail 2b29 : Fri Jun 20 2003 - 11:54:44 EDT