that's a good one Ken!
-- -Josh 2000 Dakota CC 3.9L"KenCo" <ken@kencofish.com> wrote in message news:3E716D06.25FD96C@kencofish.com... > > > > saw this on another group :) > > > > For all of you who occasionally have a really bad day, and you just need > to take it > out on someone, don't take it out on someone you know, take it out on > someone > you don't know. > > I was sitting at my desk, when I remembered a phone call I had forgotten > to > make. I found the number and dialed it. A man answered saying, "Hello?" > I politely said, "This is Fred Hanifin, could I please speak with Robin > Carter?" > Suddenly, the phone was slammed down on me. I couldn't believe that > anyone > could be so rude. > > I tracked down Robin's correct number, and called her. (I had transposed > the last > two digits of her phone number). > > After hanging up with her, I decided to call the 'wrong' number again. > > When the same guy answered the phone, I yelled, "You're an asshole!" and > hung > up. > > I wrote his number down, with the word 'asshole' next to it, and put it > in my desk > drawer. Every couple of weeks, when I was paying bills or had a really > bad day, > I'd call him up and yell, "You're an asshole!" > > It always cheered me up. > > When Caller ID came to our area, I thought my therapeutic 'asshole' > calling would > have to stop. > > So, I called his number and said, "Hi, this is John Smith from the > Telephone > Company. I'm just calling to see if you're familiar with the caller ID > program?" he > yelled, "NO!" and slammed the phone down. I quickly called him back and > said, > "That's because you're an asshole!" > > So, one day I was at the store, getting ready to pull into a parking > spot. Some > boy in a black BMW cut me off, and pulled into the spot I had patiently > waited > for. I hit the horn and yelled that I had been waiting for the spot. > > The idiot ignored me. I noticed a "For Sale" sign in his car window, so > I wrote > down his number. > > A couple of days later, right after calling the first asshole (I had his > number on > speed dial), I thought I had better call !the BMW asshole, too. > > I dialed and someone said, "Hello?" > > I said, "Is this the man with the black BMW for sale?" > > "Yes it is." > > "Can you tell me where I can see it?" > > "Yes, I live at 802 West 34th Street. It's a yellow house and the car's > parked > right out front." > > "What's your name?" I asked. "My name is Don Hansen," he said. > > "When's a good time to catch you, Don?" > > "I'm home every evening after five." > > "Listen, Don, can I tell you something?" > > "Yes?" > > "Don, you're an asshole!" Then I hung up, and added his number to my > speed dial, > too. Now, when I had a problem, I had two assholes to call. > > But after several months of calling them, it wasn't as enjoyable as it > used to be. > > So, I came up with an idea: I called Asshole #1. > > "Hello" > > "You're an asshole!" (but I didn't hang up.) "Are you still there?" he > asked. > > "Yeah," I said. > > "Stop calling me," he screamed > > "Make me," I said. > > "Who are you?" he asked. > > "My name is Don Hansen." > > "Yeah? Where do you live?" > > "Asshole, I live at 802 West 34th Street, a yellow house with my black > Beemer > parked in front." > > He said, "I'm coming over right now, Don. And you had better start > saying your > prayers." > > I said, "Yeah, like I'm really scared, asshole." > > Then I called asshole # 2: > > "Hello?" he said. > > "Hello Asshole," I said. > > He yelled, "If I ever find out who you are..." > > "You'll what?" I said. > > "I'll kick your ass," he exclaimed. > > I answered, "Well, asshole, here's your chance. I'm coming over right > now." > Then, I hung up, and immediately called the police, saying that I lived > at 802 > West 34th Street, and I was on my way over there to kill my gay lover. > > Then, I called Channel 13 news about the gang war going down on West > 34th St. > I quickly got into my car and headed over to 34th St. > > There, I saw two assholes beating the crap out of each other in front of > 6 squad > cars, police helicopter, and a news crew. > > Now, I feel better. > > > > > > > -- > http://www.kencofish.com Ken Arnold, > 401-781-9642 cell 401-225-0556 > Importer/Exporter of Goldfish,Koi,rare Predators > Shipping to legal states/countries only! > Permalon liners, Oase & Supreme Pondmaster pumps > > > Please Note: No trees or animals were harmed in the > sending of this contaminant free message We do concede > that a signicant number of electrons may have been > inconvenienced.
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