You know you are a Ricer if

From: Danny Burrows (havenx@ksni.net)
Date: Mon Mar 31 2003 - 23:14:11 EST


You know you are a Ricer if........

...you find yourself using the excuse 'yo, but you gots twice as many
cylindas, du' after EVERY race

... you drive a 4 door 'type R'

... your gumby pants make it hard to shift

... more than 20 of your mods involve sheilding whats actually underneath

... you have stickers that even most asians don't get

... you have stickers for parts you dont have

... you refer to 50hp as the 'big shot'

... your car has so much camber it can drive on its side

... when you drive by, WWII veterans run for shelter

... your exhaust tip diameter is 4 times the inner muffler diameter

... you have 'power by' anything anywhere on a car made by the engine
manufacturer

... birds make nests on your spoiler because its taller than the trees

... you sell crack for the image...not the money

... you have 'N/T' polished on the side of car and you dont know what
bracket racing is

... you will only race if the other guy removes four sparkplugs

... you can't race up hills

... you have "All Motor" emblazoned on your rear hatch right next to
your 15.50 dial in

... you brag to have nitrous and have a 14.50 dial in

... your exhaust system for your 1.8L is bigger than most Pro-stock cars

... you spent more money on stickers and stripes than your parents paid
for your car

... you go to a performance shop and immediately start rummaging through
the decal bin

... your tach is bigger than your head

... you have a shiftlight and your car is an automatic

... you refuse to race it at races because it's a "show car" and at car
shows you refuse to show it because it's a "race car"

... your only mods are cut factory springs and a 5" chrome exhaust tip

... at Autocross events you don't participate because you have a drag
race setup and at drag events you brag about kicking ass on the autocross.

... you have more lights on the front of your car than the USS Voyager

... you brag about a turbo kit that never seems to get installed.

... your exhaust sounds like a dying Moose

... your bright green $300 air filter is bigger than your engine.



This archive was generated by hypermail 2b29 : Fri Feb 06 2004 - 11:46:06 EST