okay.. I'll take a stab at this =) read carefully... I changed a few
things =)
"twas the Dak before Christmas"... hehehe
'Twas the night before Christmas and out on the streets,
All DAKOTAS were winning against Fords and "Heartbeats."
The stop lights were hung over Main street with care,
Getting ready to change for those drivers who dare.
The children were nestled all snug in their beds,
While visions of R/T's raced in their heads.
My wife on the phone and I in the garage,
staring at my DAKOTA collage,
When out on the drive rolled up such a rumble,
You knew for the owner it was hard to be humble.
I recognized the sound but had to see for myself.
I knew this was no blue oval elf.
I was right, there it was in its SOLAR YELLOW,
A 99 R/T. Built for the go.
Then came a clunk from a big brown Sack,
and the figure grabbed his toolbox out from the back
He continues up the driveway, with the thud from his boot,
Then there he stood in a Tor Red and white suit.
It was W. JACK HILTON in all of his glory!
"But JACK, please tell me, just what is the story?"
"Where is your sleigh and your eight tiny deer?"
"I traded them in on 250 horses and a 3.91 gear!"
"I test drove 'em all, and the others just suck,
"None can beat 'Chebbies' like this bad-ass truck."
"And son you've been good and learned all the tricks."
"So I'm swapping your 6er for a 426!"
"and I brought you a special treat, just from my shop,"
"this Hemi's built Supercharged, with a Vortech on top" =)
"and to make sure you take off, when there's green on the tree"
"I'm outfitting your rear end with a 4.10 SG"
"and to make sure you're legal come inspection day"
"I've got these here papers from that dern EPA"
So he grabbed up his tools and went straight to the chore,
The swap took him an hour, no less and no more.
This guy was good but somethings not right,
JACK couldn't have learned, to do that overnight.
He torqued the last nut and then walked away.
"With this," he said proudly, "you'll run 10's' all day."
All at once it then hit me, I recognized the voice.
His skill with the tools, his words of choice.
Once I figured it out, it was really no surprise.
This was JON STEIGER in a Santa disguise.
He collected his tools and went back to his DAK,
Wiped his hands on a rag and tossed his tools in the back.
With a whine of the starter the beast came alive,
And with a shift to reverse he backed out of my drive.
With shifter in hand, and a big childish grin,
There was a Roar of Mopar as the tires began to spin.
I tried to hold my breath, but couldn't help but choke,
as my driveway and neighborhood were ingulfed in tire smoke =)
I could see he was happy about what he had done,
He had turned my DAKOTA into major HEMI fun.
I offered him brewskis, as a method of thanks,
but he had Hemi's to swap, and Chebbies to spank
And I heard him exclaim, over the loud engine's roar,
"Let all DAKOTAs spank Chebbies, and have pinging no more!"
P.S. I took er' to the track and got on the race scene,
she now did the 'quarter in 10, when it once took 14 =)
hehehehe
-mike d.
88, V6, LE, 3.55, Slush-o-matic, many mods.
<a href="http://www.geocities.com/MotorCity/Pit/1133">
<a href="mailto:miggitymike@juno.com">
"Horn's broken, watch for finger" =)
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