Ok...sorry for the Off Topic posts...but these are really funny.
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Acura 3.2TL - My car has been mistaken for a UFO at night.
Acura Integra - I have always wanted to own the Buick of sports cars.
Acura Integra - Got any spare coffee cans?
Acura Legendary - I'm too bland for German cars.
Acura NSX - I am impotent.
Acura NSX - I drive a poor man's Ferrari.
AM General Hummer - For what I lack in cubic inches, I make up for in size.
AMC Gremlin - I could only afford three-fourths of a Hornet.
AMC Marlin - My father wouldn' t buy me a Camaro.
Audi 90 - I enjoy putting out engine fires
Audi 80 - I thought the 4000s was too fast.
Austin-Healey 3000 - I can put raw meat on the transmission hump and have a
well-done steak by the time I
arrive anywhere.
Buick Park Avenue - I am older than 34 of the 50 states.
Buick Electra - Hey, it's 30-year old technology. But it's GOOD 30-year old
technology.
Buick Reatta - I like ugly, impractical, boring cars.
Cadillac Cimarron - I am stupid enough to pay extra money for an uglified
Chevrolet.
Cadillac Eldorado - I am a very good Mary Kay salesman.
Cadillac Seville - I pimp hoes and tricks.
Chevrolet Camaro - My head rattles almost as badly as my car.
Chevrolet Chevette - My insurance payment is higher than my car payment.
Chevrolet Corvette - I'm in a mid-life crisis.
Chevrolet El Camino - I am leading a militia to overthrow the government.
Chevrolet Impalla - I took 2nd place at the 22nd Annual Southern California
Low Rider Contest
Chevrolet Yukon - I am on a first name basis with my mechanic.
Chrysler Cordoba - I dig the rich Corinthian leather.
Datsun 280Z - I have a kilo of cocaine in my wheel well.
Dodge Charger - Reliable is boring. My car is exciting.
Dodge Caravan - My child can beat up your honor student.
Dodge Dart - I teach third grade special education and I voted for
Eisenhower.
Dodge Viper - For what I lack in size, I make up in cubic inches.
Ford Mustang - I slow down to 85 in school zones.
Ford Mustang - Traction? We don't need no stinkin' traction!
Ford Crown Victoria - I enjoy having people slow to 55mph and change lanes
when I pull up behind them.
Ford Taurus - Sure it's ugly as sin, but it's a Ford.
Geo Tracker - I haven't tried to make any emergency lane changes yet.
GM EV1 - I created the EPA's ten most wanted list.
Honda del Sol - I have always said, half a convertible is better than no
convertible at all.
Honda Civic - I have bad credit or no credit at all.
Honda Civic - Complete mint condition interior for sale.
Honda Accord - I lack any originality and am basically a lemming.
Infiniti Q45 - I am a physician with 17 malpractice suits pending.
Isuzu Impulse - I do not give a rip about J.D. Power or his reports.
Isuzu Rodeo - I like my Rodeos sunny side up.
Jaguar XJ6 - I can afford $60,000 for a car that is in the shop 280 days per
year.
Jeep Wrangler - I am fiercely independent, just like all my friends with
Jeeps.
Jeep Wrangler - I am fortunate not to have rolled my jeep, unlike all my
friends with Jeeps.
Kia Sephia - I learned nothing from the failure of Daihatsu.
Lotus Esprit - Ever pay $2000 for a tune up? I do.
Lincoln Town Car - I live for bingo and covered dish suppers.
Mercedes 500SL - I play a major league sport.
Mercedes A-Class - I yield at all moose crossings.
Mercedes M-Class - I only paid $3,000 above sticker for mine.
Mazda Miata - I do not fear being decapitated by an eighteen-wheeler.
MGB - I am dating a mechanic.
Mitsubishi Diamante - I don't know what it means either.
Mitsubishi Eclipse GST - My ego is constantly shattered by domestic V8's
Nissan 300ZX - Sure it's slow, but Stillen makes a great spoiler!
Oldsmobile Cutlass - I just stole this car and I'm going to make a fortune
off the parts.
Oldsmobile Eighty-Eight - My car comes with a Depends first aid kit and and
bingo card holder.
Peugeot 505 Diesel - I am on the EPA's Ten Most Wanted List.
Plymouth Fury - I like driving an air-conditioned sofa that can carry your
car in my trunk as a spare.
Plymouth Neon - Screw Civics, I own a REAL car.
Porsche 944 - I am dating big haired women that otherwise would be
inaccessible to me.
Renault 2CV - I think your car is ugly too.
Rolls Royce Silver Shadow - I think Pat Buchanan is a tad too liberal.
Subaru Legacy - I have always wanted a Japanese car even more inferior than
Isuzu.
Triumph TR6 - I am an amateur mechanic who enjoys a challenge.
Toyota Camry - I am still in the closet.
Toyota Supra - I use my spoiler to dry my laundry.
Volkswagon Beetle - I still watch Partridge Family reruns.
Volkswagon Cabriolet - I am out of the closet.
VW Jetta - I stopped smoking pot when I got a real job after college. I
swear.
Volkswagon Microbus - If this van's a rockin' don't come a knockin'.
Volvo 740 Wagon - My wife is a moving road hazard so I bought her this car.
Volvo 240 - Other drivers are unsafe. Let me go ahead and pull out in front
of this guy to slow him down.
This archive was generated by hypermail 2b29 : Fri Jun 20 2003 - 12:19:08 EDT