My Caroscope from cartalk.com (very hilarious and very long...sorry)

From: Nate Johnson (natedak2k@yahoo.com)
Date: Tue Apr 04 2000 - 09:48:15 EDT


So, this is what the idiots at cartalk have to say about me and my Dakota!
BWAAAAAAAAAHAHAHAHHAA there so right and at the same time SOOO wrong!!
-----
Comparing You to Other Dodge Dakota Owners
Boy oh boy, Nate, you picked a vehicle that just isn't quite right for
you. You're compatible with your Dodge Dakota only in terms of status
consciousness and your grasp of reality.

When compared to other people who drive a Dodge Dakota, you're a bit too
young to be driving this vehicle, you care a bit too much about your car
compared to other Dodge Dakota owners, your educational level is a bit
lower than that of other Dodge Dakota owners, other Dodge Dakota owners
make more money than you, you're a little too much of a risk-taker, and
you're, well--to be generous--a bit too frugal

For your further edification, here's a little further elucidation on these
personality characteristics.

My dear, it appears that other Dodge Dakota owners just don't care as much
about their cars as you do. You're going to have to lighten up on this if
you insist on driving a Dodge Dakota. But, since this is probably a basic
character flaw and therefore unchangeable, you probably will have to buy a
new car to get your carma in balance.

You certainly are a bit of a nut case, aren't you, when it comes to taking
chances (well, at least compared to other Dodge Dakota owners). Calm down.
CALM DOWN! It's not the end of the world, for heaven's sake. And nobody is
asking you to change anything about who you are. We'd never do that. Go
ahead. Jump off a cliff if that's what makes you happy. But, if this is
really what you are, you're gonna have to change vehicles.

OK, there's frugal--and then there's cheap. And you're cheap.

Your motto is probably something like, "Waste not, want not." Heck, if it
was good enough for Benjamin Franklin, why not you?

Pay no attention to what others are saying behind your back. Who cares?

Car-O-Scope Makes Suggestions for More Compatible Vehicles
Have no fear, Car-O-Scope is here to save you from a life of misery,
depression and hemorrhoidal flare-ups. Through a secret and proprietary
process (patent pending) the official car-o-scope has determined that your
psychographic and demographic profile is far more compatible with the
following vehicles: some of these suggestions might surprise you. But try
to keep an open mind. It's quite possible that the car-o-scope has
discovered some hidden and/or repressed aspects of your personality.

 1. Plymouth Duster
2. AMC Jeep
3. Chevrolet Camaro
4. Dodge Daytona
5. Dodge Colt Vista

So, let's look at your compatibility profile vis-a-vis the Chevrolet
Camaro. If you dumped that Dodge Dakota and got yourself a Chevrolet
Camaro, you'd be a lot happier.

For example, you'd be almost perfectly compatible in terms of your gender,
status consciousness, and your grasp of reality.

In addition, you'd have pretty good compatibility in terms of your age,
how much you really care about your car, your educational level, your
income, your tolerance for taking risks, and the extent to which you're a
cheapskate.

=====
Nate, Ogden UT
http://www.geocities.com/natedak2k
Forest Green 00 Dakota CC 4X4, 5-speed, LSD, 3.92 Rear, 4.7L/287ci, Po'boy cold air w/ K&N, Extang BlackMax Tonneau
"D2K"

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