Re: Southern Humor (off topic, sorry)

From: Chuck Robbins (intense99dak@home.com)
Date: Fri Oct 06 2000 - 23:03:26 EDT


Okay, I kinda hate to say it, but a smile did appear ;-) Anyone
have some good swamp yankee jokes?

Chuck Robbins
'99 Intense Blue Dakota Sport
www.intense99dak.com

>
> > > How do you know when you're staying in a Kentucky
> > > hotel?
> > > When you call the front desk and say "I've gotta leak
> > > in my sink"
> > > And the person at the front desk says "go ahead."
> > >
> > >
> > >
> > >
> > > How can you tell if a Texas redneck is married?
> > > There is dried chewing tobacco on both sides of his
> > > pickup truck.
> > >
> > >
> > >
> > >
> > > Did you hear that they have raised the minimum
> > > drinking age in Tennessee to 32?
> > > It seems they want to keep alcohol out of the high
> > > schools!
> > >
> > >
> > >
> > >
> > > What do they call reruns of "Hee Haw" in Mississippi?
> > > A documentary.
> > >
> > >
> > >
> > >
> > > How many rednecks does it take eat a 'possum?
> > > Two. One to eat, and one to watch out for traffic.
> > >
> > >
> > >
> > >
> > > Why did God invent armadillos?
> > > So that Texas rednecks can have 'possum on the
> > > half shell.
> > >
> > >
> > >
> > >
> > > Where was the toothbrush invented?
> > > Oklahoma. If it was invented anywhere else it
> > > would have been called a teethbrush.
> > >
> > >
> > >
> > >
> > > Arkansas State trooper pulls over a pickup truck on
> > > I-40. He says to the driver, "Got any ID?"
> > > The driver says, "Bout what?"
> > >
> > >
> > >
> > >
> > > Did you hear about the $3,000,000 Tennessee
> > > State Lottery?
> > > The winner gets $3 a year for a million years.
> > >
> > >
> > >
> > >
> > > Why did O. J. Simpson want to move to West Virginia?
> > > Everyone has the same DNA.
> > >
> > >
> > >
> > >
> > > Did you hear that the governor's mansion in Little
> > > Rock, Arkansas burned down?
> > > Yep. Pert' near took out the whole trailer park.
> > >
> > >
> > >
> > >
> > > A new law recently passed in North Carolina:
> > > When a couple gets divorced, they're still
> > > brother and sister.
> > >
> > >
> > >
> > >
> > > What's the best thing to ever come out of Arkansas?
> > > I-40.
> > >
> > >
> > >
> > >
> > > Two Mississippians are walking down different ends of
> > > a street toward each other, and one is carrying a
> > > sack. When they meet, one says, "Hey Tommy Ray,
> > > what'cha got in th' bag?" "Jus' some chickens."
> > > "If I guesses how many they are, can I have one?"
> > > "Shoot, ya guesses right and I'll give you both of
> > > them." "OK. Ummmmm . . . five?"
> > >
> > >
> > >
> > >
> > > What do a divorce in Alabama, a tornado in Kansas, and
> > > a hurricane in Florida have in common?
> > > Somebody's fixin' to lose them a trailer.
> > >
> > >
> > >
> > >
> > > A Mississippian came home and found his house on fire,
> > > he rushed next door, telephoned the fire department
> > > and shouted, "Hurry over here. My house is on fire!"
> > > "OK," replied the fireman, "how do we get there?"
> > > "Shucks, don't you still have those big red trucks?"
> > >
> > >
> > >
> > >
> > > Why do folks in Kentucky go to the movie theater in
> > > groups of 18 or more?
> > > 'Cuz 17 and under not admitted.
> > >
> > >
> > >
> > >
> > > What do you get when you have 32 rednecks in the same
> > > room?
> > > A full set of teeth.
>
>
>
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> Pioneer Stereo, Bugflector II Bug Guard, Fender Flairs, Tinted Windows,
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> http://www.intense99dak.com/chris.htm
>
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