Its no April fools Joke unfortunatly (long)

From: Terrible Tom (SilverEightynine@earthlink.net)
Date: Tue Apr 01 2003 - 23:28:08 EST


Some of you may be skeptical if this is true or not, being that I am
posting this on April Fools Day. My family didn't believe me at first
either.

I'll swear to whatever Gods you believe in and swear on my late
grandfathers honor and name, that this is true. I'll have pics posted
for you tomarrow. I am unable to operate a camcorder ot other
sophisticated equipment at the moment due to a six pack of theraputic
"medicine".

I went up to my familys cottage in northern Wisconsin to retreive a few
items and check in on the place. I got up bright and early at noon -
showered, and hit the road. I arrived at the cottage at approximatly
3:30 PM central. THe dirt road was covered in 3 inches or so of recent
(friday) snow. The temps were in upper 40s lower 50s so the snow was
very slushy and there was lots of standing water. The Jeep handled it
well and I was having a ball doing some unschedualed wheeling. I made
it down the road and to the house.

Now let me stop and give you a bit of background info here. I purchased
the Jeep and recieved two keys. I lost my spare key a month or two ago.
  Leaving me with a single door/ignition key. My garage door opener
remote is broken and I have been unable to find a replacement remote for
it. I tried a universal remote - but it doesn't work with my specific
model opener. This requires me to go in the house and open the door
from the inside switch. I also had misplaced my spare house keys. (see
a pattern developing here?)

So the other night - I didn't feel like shutting off the Jeep to take
the keys out of the ignition, so as I had been doing for a week or two
now - I removed the ignition key from the keychain - leaving only the
ignition key in the Jeep - with th eengine running. I went in - opened
the door and parked the Jeep inside. So today - I found the loose key
in my coat pocked and remarked to myself that I didnt put it back on the
keychain. Now a normal person would have put the key back on the ring
immediatly. I didn't. I drove the trip with just the ignition key loose.

So here we are back up at my cabin in the middle of the woods no where
near civilization. I get out - inspect the outside of the house - then
I go in - inspect the inside. And before I was to load up the items I
went up there to retreive... I wanted to take a quick spin down the back
road to a near by lake. I went out to the jeep and realized th key
wasnt in the ignition. I looked all over inside the house - I looksed
all over inside thejeep - and about an hour later after not having found
the key - I realized I was going to find it at all. I must have dropped
it in the snow. Which at that point had been well walked through and
the key could be anywhere around the grounds.

I had no cell phone - only my CB - so for the next hour and a half I
alternated between trying to raise someone on the radio - and looking
for the key. Now it was getting close to 6 pm - I had been there three
hours and it was starting to get dark. I had a little food with me, a
change of clothes, a blanket and a pillow I brought along "just in case"
- not thinking I would actually NEED my emergency stuff. I had no
flashlight either. I could have spent the night in the cabin if I had
to - I could have made a fire and lit some candels. But I knew it was
going to be along walk before I could get to any houses. Ther eis a
near by lake - that had it still been frozen over - I could have walked
across to some homes on the other side. But the recent warm spell has
caused most of the ice in the state to become too dangerous to walk
across. The only other homes near me were unoccupied - as they are
owned by seasonal (summer) residents.

I knew my family was going to think I was laying dead somewhere if the
didnt hear from me by the end of the day.

So the option I came up with and chose - - was to "boost" my own jeep.
I found a wood chisle in the house - broke opwn the steering column -
broke the ignition lock off - and started the jeep with the chistle -
just like you see on COPS on tv all the time. I did it in less than 10
minutes. It took me that long because first of all it was killing me to
actually have to do this. And also because i had not ever done that
before and didn't exactly know what I was supposed to do. I had seen it
done on TV before. After I did it - - I thought to myself - damn that
was so easy - why do they bother putting locks on the cars in the first
place? Had I known the precice procedure - I'm sure I could have
boosted the jeep in under a minute.

I drove the rest of the way home half crying half laughing at what
happened. I was hiding behind a stare trooper for about 60 miles on the
way home. I didn't dare pass him for fear he might see the shattered
steering column and pull me over.

And as if thigns wernt weird enough - my friend who did me a favor and
arranged the sale of the jeep for me, called me tonight to see how I was
doing. I didnt have the guts to tell him what happened. He would never
let me forget it. I would have heard about how irrisponcible I am and
yadda yadda till the day I die. I feel like shit enough as it is - I
wasnt going to let him have a chance to rub my nose in it any more.

If I ever find that key...... (shudder)

If you will excuse me now... I'm going to finish getting drunk.

I'll have pictures of the jeep tomarrow as proof.

-- 
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Terrible Tom

"It's a living thing... It breathes, it eats, ...and it hates..."

Silver '89 Dakota Reg Cab, V6, Auto, 8 footer, 4x2 Silver '89 Dakota Reg Cab, V6, Auto, 8 footer, 4x4 w plow - (aka Granpa) Green/Silver '95 Jeep Cherokee, I-6 HO, Auto, 4 door, 4x4

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