Thanks guys,
Your kind words and comments greatly appreciated. I really wasn't going to
comment on this whatsoever, until I read these posts. Please don't let
these kinds of comments upset you. I have to admit that my original
reaction was that I was upset, more so hurt, but this lasted um... a few
minutes only. It's been a long, hard road to learn how to brush these
things off. These days I simply reflect on lessons learned from a close
friend and psychologist to do the following exercise: 1) Look at the
source. 2) Does the source hold any validity or value to you? 3) Does it
directly affect your income, housing, or family? 4) If not, don't give your
power or waste your time and energy. That energy can be better spent on
something that holds meaning for you instead.
Basically, it just doesn't matter what anyone thinks or says. It can't hurt
you, unless you allow it to do so. Anything that doesn't kill you, makes
you stronger :-) I just got stronger when I needed it most... so you'll
think this strange, but.... thanks Kyle :-)
On an upbeat note... ok... damn exciting note for me anyway.... I just
landed the opportunity of a lifetime this past weekend. I was approached by
someone on my Fibromyalgia support group to co-author a book with her.
Writing a book is something I have wanted to do since childhood, and it's
now happening. My partner has already done 7 years of research for the
book. I couldn't figure out why she asked me, when her own brother was
already a published author and more than willing to write it with her. She
says that she had read some of my work in our writer's group and some of my
work online and believed in her heart that I was the perfect one for this
project. Sooooo, after a week of humming an hawing, giving all my reasons
why I shouldn't or can't do this job, I gave in and signed the contract
between us.
When you face as much pain and frustration on a daily basis as I have been
these last 6.5 years since my accident with the '95 dak, you tend not to
believe that you have anything left inside you to be able to give what would
be needed for such an undertaking. Believe me, I tried like heck to back
out of this project, but my writing partner managed to tear down each excuse
I made and forced me to face my fears. And that's what it was, fear of not
being good enough and fear of failure. As she pointed out to me... it's
guaranteed failure already if you don't even try.
I am very, very excited about this project. I've already put down the first
chapter into words and I can't seem to stop thinking about what's going to
happen next in this novel. It infiltrates my dreams, my waking moments,
hell, I can't even eat breakfast without thinking about it as it's the first
thing enters my mind when my eyes open in the morning. What a truly
wondrous blessing, this thing called adrenalin is. It's most definitely
nature's best pain killer.
Now the trick will be to get this book written while still attending
Chiropractor, Massage Therapy, Acupuncture, Physiotherapy with an Osteopath,
and workouts with my physiotherapist/personal trainer. I never would have
believed that all these treatments could become a full time job. The good
news from all this work is that I no longer require a cane when walking, my
future of living with a wheelchair has been eliminated, and I'm getting
stronger and healthier. I kid you not though, this all has taken a long
time, serious dedication and commitment, and let's not even go into the cost
:-(
Ok... I've babbled on long enough, sorry for the long-winded post. I just
wanted to share my news and explain why I haven't been around as much as I
used to.
Norah Bleazard http://www.bleazard.net Burlington, Ontario
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