For all of you out there who hate Fords, I though you might get a laugh
from this. Sorry for it being so long. I found it at Magnum's Domain
Page, which can be found on the Dodge Dakota Webring.
Joe T.
Wants a Dodge Dakota CC Sport+ 4x4 Flame Red OR
Ford F-150 SuperCab 4x4 Black with 4x4 Off-Road OR
Ford Ranger SuperCab 4x4 Black with 4x4 Off-Road OR
A WINNING POWERBALL TICKET!!!!!!!!!!!! don't we all???
Sometimes the best jokes are true. On May 12, Ford announced a recall on
it's Expeditions and F-series trucks. Faulty lug nuts could cause the
tires to
FALL OFF. It just keeps getting better.
If all the vehicles in America were 'built Ford tough', the shoulders of
America's highways would be a much more crowded place.
Speed kills
Drive a Ford
Live forever
*New For Ford in'98*
Ford has announced that starting in '98, on both its F-series and Ranger
pickups, a new standard option. It will begin to install both heaters and
cup holders on the tailgates of these trucks. This is designed to provide
comfort for the passengers in these vehicles. In the winter months, when
these vehicles breakdown and need pushed, they can keep their hands warm,
along with having a place to set a beverage.
If you were disappointed to see Alan Jackson doing a Ford comercial,
don't worry. Admission is the first step to recovery. He says himself
that if he had the money, he'd go downtown and buy a Ford truck or two.
In other words, if they weren't so darn expensive, he'd buy two so he
could have one to drive while the other one is in the shop.
If you're baffled why Ford is acutally competetive in NASCAR, don't be.
They have teams of mechanics working around the clock for a week, just so
they can run a race.
F - Found
O - On
R - Roadside
D - DEAD
F - Fix
O - Or
R - Replace
D - Daily
Question: How do you double the value of a Ford?
Answer: Put Gas in it.
Question: How is a golf ball different than a Ford?
Answer: You can drive a golf ball 200 yards.
Question: How much wood could a Ford truck haul, if a Ford truck could
haul wood?
Answer: How ever much the Dodge truck in front of it could tow.
90% of the Fords made in the last 10 years are still on the road, the
other 10% made it home.
F - Forget
O - Off
R - Road
D - Driving
F - Ford
O - Owners
R - Recommend
D - Dodge
Ashes to Ashes
Dust to Dust
If it was not for Ford
Our Tools would be rust.
F - Flip
O - Over
R - Read
D - Directions
F - Fails
O - On
R - Rainy
D - Days
In light of Dodge's recent success with the new body style on the Ram
pick-ups, Ford has decided to try and emulate this success. Ford has
began purchasing Rams, making some engine degradations, putting
blue ovals on the front, and selling them as F-350's.
No matter which way you look at it,
D - Drivers
R - Return
O - On
F - Foot
D - Dodge
R - Rules
O - Over
F - Ford
Henry Ford dies and goes to heaven. At the gates, the guy tells Ford,
"Well, you've been such a good guy and your invention, the car, changed
the world. As a reward, you can hang out with anyone you want in heaven."
So, Henry Ford thinks about it and says, "I wanna hang with Adam, the
first man." So, the guy at the gates points Adam out to Ford. When Ford
gets to Adam, Ford asks, "Hey, aren't you the inventor of the woman?"
Adam says yes. "Well," says Ford, "You have some major design flaws in
your invention:
1.there's too much front end protrusion.
2.it chatters at high speeds.
3.the rear end wobbles too much.
4.and the intake is placed too close to the exhaust."
"Hmmm...", says Adam, "hold on." So Adam goes to the celestial
supercomputer, types in a few keystrokes, and waits for the result. The
computer prints out a slip of paper and Adam reads it. He then says to
Henry Ford, "It may be that my invention is flawed, but according to the
stellar computer, more men are riding my invention than yours."
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This archive was generated by hypermail 2b29 : Fri Jun 20 2003 - 12:10:39 EDT