Help....
I've fallen on the floor laughing at Ford and I can't get up.
What a great start to a weekend.
Thanks Joe.
Joe E Thomson wrote:
> For all of you out there who hate Fords, I though you might get a laugh
> from this. Sorry for it being so long. I found it at Magnum's Domain
> Page, which can be found on the Dodge Dakota Webring.
>
> Joe T.
> Wants a Dodge Dakota CC Sport+ 4x4 Flame Red OR
> Ford F-150 SuperCab 4x4 Black with 4x4 Off-Road OR
> Ford Ranger SuperCab 4x4 Black with 4x4 Off-Road OR
> A WINNING POWERBALL TICKET!!!!!!!!!!!! don't we all???
>
> Sometimes the best jokes are true. On May 12, Ford announced a recall on
> it's Expeditions and F-series trucks. Faulty lug nuts could cause the
> tires to
> FALL OFF. It just keeps getting better.
>
> If all the vehicles in America were 'built Ford tough', the shoulders of
> America's highways would be a much more crowded place.
>
> Speed kills
>
> Drive a Ford
>
> Live forever
>
> *New For Ford in'98*
>
> Ford has announced that starting in '98, on both its F-series and Ranger
> pickups, a new standard option. It will begin to install both heaters and
> cup holders on the tailgates of these trucks. This is designed to provide
> comfort for the passengers in these vehicles. In the winter months, when
> these vehicles breakdown and need pushed, they can keep their hands warm,
> along with having a place to set a beverage.
>
> If you were disappointed to see Alan Jackson doing a Ford comercial,
> don't worry. Admission is the first step to recovery. He says himself
> that if he had the money, he'd go downtown and buy a Ford truck or two.
> In other words, if they weren't so darn expensive, he'd buy two so he
> could have one to drive while the other one is in the shop.
>
> If you're baffled why Ford is acutally competetive in NASCAR, don't be.
> They have teams of mechanics working around the clock for a week, just so
> they can run a race.
>
> F - Found
> O - On
> R - Roadside
> D - DEAD
>
> F - Fix
> O - Or
> R - Replace
> D - Daily
>
> Question: How do you double the value of a Ford?
> Answer: Put Gas in it.
>
> Question: How is a golf ball different than a Ford?
> Answer: You can drive a golf ball 200 yards.
>
> Question: How much wood could a Ford truck haul, if a Ford truck could
> haul wood?
> Answer: How ever much the Dodge truck in front of it could tow.
>
> 90% of the Fords made in the last 10 years are still on the road, the
> other 10% made it home.
>
> F - Forget
> O - Off
> R - Road
> D - Driving
>
> F - Ford
> O - Owners
> R - Recommend
> D - Dodge
>
>
> Ashes to Ashes
> Dust to Dust
> If it was not for Ford
> Our Tools would be rust.
>
> F - Flip
> O - Over
> R - Read
> D - Directions
>
> F - Fails
> O - On
> R - Rainy
> D - Days
>
>
> In light of Dodge's recent success with the new body style on the Ram
> pick-ups, Ford has decided to try and emulate this success. Ford has
> began purchasing Rams, making some engine degradations, putting
> blue ovals on the front, and selling them as F-350's.
>
> No matter which way you look at it,
>
> D - Drivers
> R - Return
> O - On
> F - Foot
>
> D - Dodge
> R - Rules
> O - Over
> F - Ford
>
>
> Henry Ford dies and goes to heaven. At the gates, the guy tells Ford,
> "Well, you've been such a good guy and your invention, the car, changed
> the world. As a reward, you can hang out with anyone you want in heaven."
>
> So, Henry Ford thinks about it and says, "I wanna hang with Adam, the
> first man." So, the guy at the gates points Adam out to Ford. When Ford
> gets to Adam, Ford asks, "Hey, aren't you the inventor of the woman?"
> Adam says yes. "Well," says Ford, "You have some major design flaws in
> your invention:
>
> 1.there's too much front end protrusion.
> 2.it chatters at high speeds.
> 3.the rear end wobbles too much.
> 4.and the intake is placed too close to the exhaust."
>
> "Hmmm...", says Adam, "hold on." So Adam goes to the celestial
> supercomputer, types in a few keystrokes, and waits for the result. The
> computer prints out a slip of paper and Adam reads it. He then says to
> Henry Ford, "It may be that my invention is flawed, but according to the
> stellar computer, more men are riding my invention than yours."
>
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This archive was generated by hypermail 2b29 : Fri Jun 20 2003 - 12:10:39 EDT