In a message dated 8/13/99 9:19:54 PM EST, BoogYT1300 writes:
>
> On a senior citizen bus tour, the driver was surprised. While the
> passengers were unloading, to do some sightseeing, one elderly lady
> stopped and whispered in his ear, "Driver, I believe that I was
> sexually harassed!"
>
> The driver didn't think much of this complaint, but promised he would
> check into it soon.
>
> Later, that very same day, as the passengers were unloading again, a
> second little old lady bent down and whispered in his ear, "Sir, I
> believe I was sexually harassed!"
>
> This time, he knew it had to be taken care of soon. A few passengers
> had remained on the bus, and he decided to go back and question them,
> to see if they had any knowledge of what was going on.
>
> He found one little old man crawling along the bus floor underneath
> the seats and stooped down to question him. "Excuse me, sir, could I
> help you?"
>
> The elderly man looked up and said, "Well, sonny, you sure can.
> I've lost my toupee and I'm trying to find it. I thought I'd located
> it twice, but they were parted in the middle, and mine's parted on
> the side!"
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
> Thought you might enjoy this one:
>
> Naval Transcript
>
>
> This is the transcript of an ACTUAL radio conversation of a
> US naval ship with Canadian authorities off the coast of
> Newfoundland in October 1995. Radio conversation released by the
> Chief of Naval Operations 10-10-95.
>
> Americans: Please divert your course 15 degrees to the
> North to avoid a collision.
>
> Canadians: Recommend you divert YOUR course 15
> degrees to the South to avoid collision.
>
> Americans: This is the Captain of a US Navy Ship. I say
> again, divert YOUR course.
>
> Canadians: No... I say again, you divert YOUR course.
>
> Americans: THIS IS THE AIRCRAFT CARRIER USS LINCOLN,
> THE SECOND LARGEST SHIP IN THE UNITED STATES ATLANTIC
> FLEET. WE ARE ACCOMPANIED BY THREE DESTROYERS,
> THREE CRUISERS, AND NUMEROUS SUPPORT VESSELS. I
> DEMAND THAT YOU CHANGE YOUR COURSE 15 DEGREES
> NORTH, THAT'S ONE FIVE DEGREES NORTH, OR COUNTER-
> MEASURES WILL BE UNDERTAKEN TO ENSURE THE SAFETY
> OF THIS SHIP.
>
> Canadians: This is a lighthouse... your call...eh?
>
So take off all you hosiers!...stupid Americans.....
CAANADAH!
BOOG
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