A mortician was working late one night. It was his job
to examine the dead bodies before they were sent off to
be buried or cremated. As he examined the body of
Mr. Schwartz, who was about to be cremated, he made an
amazing discovery: Schwartz had the longest penis he
had ever seen!
"I'm sorry Mr. Schwartz," said the mortician,
"But I can't send you off to be cremated with a tremendously
huge penis like this. It has to be saved for posterity."
And with that the coroner used his tools to remove the dead
man's schlong.
The coroner stuffed his prize into a briefcase
and took it home. The first person he showed was his wife.
"I have something to show you that you won't believe," he said,
and opened his briefcase. "Oh my god!" she screamed,
"Schwartz is dead!"
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