Beer Warnings

From: Miles Harris (spikes_duall@hotmail.com)
Date: Wed May 23 2001 - 17:47:00 EDT


Beer Warnings

Due to increasing products liability litigation, American beer Brewers have
accepted the FDA's suggestion that the following warning labels be placed
immediately on all beer containers:

WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may leave you wondering what the hell
happened to your bra.

WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may make you think you are whispering
when you are not.

WARNING: The consumption of alcohol is a major factor in dancing like a
retard.

WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may cause you to tell your friends over
and over again that you love them.

WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may cause you to think you can sing.

WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may lead you to believe that ex-lovers
are really dying for you to telephone them at four in the morning.

WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may make you think you can logically
converse with other members of the opposite sex without spitting.

WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may make you think you have mystical
Kung Fu powers, resulting in you getting your ass kicked.

WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may cause you to roll over in the
morning and see something really scary.

WARNING: The consumption of alcohol is the leading cause of inexplicable
rug burns on the forehead.

WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may create the illusion that you are
tougher, smarter, faster and better looking than most people.

WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may lead you to believe you are
invisible.

WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may lead you to think people are
laughing WITH you.

WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may cause a disturbance in the
time-space continuum, whereby gaps of time may seem to literally disappear.

WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may cause pregnancy.

-- 
Miles Harris III
Simi Valley, CA
01 Silver Dakota CC Sport, 2.5L, 5speed
01 Gold Saturn SC1 (3 door coupe) 1.9L SOC, 4speed auto
http://www.spikesautos.homestead.com/Dak1.html
Profile: http://www.twistedbits.net/WWWProfile/dakota/PfCA4R1zO470w



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