Chevy owners don't have a sense of humor, trust me, I owned a few. they had
mechanical problems I never even heard of when they happened. Now Dodge
owners have a good sense of humor, I hope!
Thanks,
Mark Kuzia
Mark's Diecast Inc.
flyboy01@comcast.net
----- Original Message -----
From: "Brian Mingle" <bsm11@cornell.edu>
To: <dakota-truck@dakota-truck.net>
Sent: Thursday, June 27, 2002 12:09 PM
Subject: Re: DML: Medical explanation for "Dak still too powerful"........
>
> I cut and pasted this, and sent it to my brother in CT, who happens to own
> a full size piece of Chevy. He didn't find it very amusing. ;-)
>
> Brian
>
> At 09:53 AM 6/27/02 -0400, you wrote:
>
> >Dear Steve P.,
> >
> >There is no problem with your Dakota. This excerpt was taken from the
latest
> >"Medical Journal", it may help you with your problem:
> >
> >You have a common medical problem known as "lackus-testiclus." It is
common
> >among Ford and Chevy owners, and also those who drive any car with less
than
> >180HP. I manifests itself in males as a change in voice to a higher
pitch,
> >like a female. Next, from obvious lack of use, the testicles shrivel to a
> >point where they are about the size of a couple of peas. At that point
there
> >is not enough testosterone to maintain being a male. I'm sure if you were
to
> >drive my Dakota, you would piss your self as soon as you fired up the
engine
> >and the exhaust makes you cry. :-(
> >
> >There is hope for you yet, keep driving your Dakota with as much tire
smoke
> >as possible, eventually your testicles will start to regrow. Then, start
> >adding mods (to the Dakota) to increase their size. :-)
> >
> >The flip side of the coin is common among GenII, 360-powered Dakota
owners,
> >"testicus-elephantitis." This is where the proximity of all that
horsepower
> >causes the testicles to grow to a point where a small gym bag is needed
to
> >carry them. This is where every stop light is a test of your reaction
time,
> >and an opportunity to prove the size of your manhood. The trick is to do
> >this and still be able to keep your drivers license, as eventually you
will
> >be sitting next to a cop at a light. Its your call at that point, you can
> >race him if you think you can outrun a Motorola, or you can stand down
and
> >allow your testicles to shrink slightly, but then you can stay driving
until
> >the next race. Good luck with your problem Steve.
> >
> >;-o
> >
> >Thanks,
> >Dr. Mark Kuzia
> >flyboy01@comcast.net
> >http://mywebpages.comcast.net/flyboy01/95daksale
> >
> > >Guys,I need to do something with this truck. It has
> > >way too much take-off,midrange,and top-end power! A
> > >little bit ago,I was stopped at a light beside one of
> > >those "leading-brand" pickups,and he kinda revved it
> > >up a little,like he thought he was gonna get the,how
> > >you say,"smack-down" on me? But when the light turned
> > >green,I simply depressed the accelerator pedal
> > >modestly,and all of a sudden,there was no one around
> > >me anymore! It kinda freaked me out,and I started to
> > >wonder if he had ever really been there in the first
> > >place! So it`s obvious that these 4.7`s have too much
> > >horsepower from the factory,or something. I`m
> > >embarassed for these people! Is there something I
> > >could maybe dip the throttle body in to make it a
> > >little more restrictive,or some kind of box I could
> > >plug in to screw up my timing at the flip of a switch?
> > >(Truck`s too powerful). Thanks! P.S. I am SURE that
> > >others on the list here have many of the same
> > >concerns! Heh heh.
> >
> >Steve P.
>
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