RE: A call to all Canuk Dak owners

From: Norah Bleazard (norah.dml@bleazard.net)
Date: Fri Nov 29 2002 - 09:09:15 EST


I tried to fight it, but I just can't. I have to comment on some of these..
I just have to.... and yes... I am opinionated :-)

> It appears we crossed the line with our neighbours to the south
> when an aide
> to Prime Minister Jean Chretien referred to America’s big cheese,
> George W.
> Bush,
> as a moron.

ok.... name one political leader that isn't a moron? Quick.. just name one.
Our prime minister is one as well.

> The remark has sent Americans into such a tizzy some are now
> dusting off their
> atlases to find out where Canada is located.

I'll get crap from this one... but most Americans have trouble realizing
that anything even exists past their border and are always in complete shock
when they find out they weren't the first, the discoverer, or the inventor
of a specific item. But I guess Canada now sits in the same world seat as
the U.S. did at one time. It's hard being the younger one.

> Novak also referred to Canada as a “country of weenies.”
> Now them’s fightin’ words, eh?

My personal opinion... majority of Canadians are weenies. Weenies in the
respect of not taking action. Just being a nation of complainers without
power. I believe the action of rallying and gathering to fight anything may
take away from our Hockey and beer time.

> The list will include Jim Carrey, Pamela Anderson, Michael J. Fox, Wayne
> Gretzky,
> Leslie Neilsen and Peter Jennings. Dion, the songbird from
> Quebec, can stay in
> Las Vegas.

I want the border closed to Alex Trebec, William Shatner and Jonathan
Roberts (aka New Music ex-host J.D. Roberts.. seems funny not to see him in
jeans and long hair on the news)

> Every Canadian-born hockey player now toiling for an American
> team will also
> return to the Great White North.
>
> We’ll enlist the guy who starred in the “I am Canadian” commercials to
> deliver speeches
> to rally the troops across this vast country.

WOOOOOHOOOOOOO go Joe go!!!... I got the video of his rant... funniest
commercial ever not viewed by an American. Which reminds me of a joke I
read recently... best sentence that no American will understand... Honey,
pass me a "SERVIETTE" I've spilled my "POUTINE" on the "CHESTERFIELD".

> Then, we’ll hit ’em where it hurts.
>
> We’ll find a way to hijack their TV airwaves and fill them with a steady
> stream of Canadian
> comedies and dramas. With all the talent we’ve lost to the
> so-called brain
> drain, surely
> there must be some native Canuck who could pull off such a feat.

> Picture it: An American sits down in front of his beloved boob tube
> prepared to watch
> Survivor; instead all he gets are reruns of David Suzuki’s Nature
> of Things.

NOOOO PLEASE.. I beg of you NOOOOO... Even I can't take those.

> We will substitute the hit drama Boston Public with Degrassi Junior High;
> Beachcombers will replace Friends; and Mike Bullard will take
> over the time
> slot
> normally reserved for David Letterman and Jay Leno.
>
> On Sundays, we will replace their beloved National Football
> League games with
> classic CFL matches. All weather forecasts will be from Winnipeg
> in February.

You mean Winterpeg, Manisnowba.

> To seal the victory, we will make them watch the CBC epic
> Canada: A People’s History, followed by the Trudeau mini-series.

That's it.. I'm moving to Mexico.

> They’ll be screaming fuddle duddle while running for cover. The last thing
> they will want to do is invade us. Victory will be ours.

The Invasion as already begun Tom. I've been spotting Tim Horton's in
Michigan and New York. We're hitting them slowly with coffee and donuts.
The typical Canadian type of invasion - slow and steady. First with hockey,
actors, music, and now... WHAMMO... Timmy's. And I believe there are at
least 2 Swiss Chalet restaurants in the U.S.

> I call on every Canadian Dakota owner to convoy his Dakota and pet beaver
> (Sic 'em!) to the nearest border crossing and help seal our
> borders! Let's
> make
> the first move while they're still stuff with turkey!

Wait a minute... There's a border??? I thought those were just nosey cops
doing spot checks asking where I was going. But seriously... being married
to an American gives me the right to point out all the annoying things on
both sides of the border and I've got a list a 1/4 mile long :-) I think
both Americans and Canadians could use a good lesson from my mom... Play
nice and share your toys... don't make me bring out the wooden spoon!!!!

There.. I have ranted and stepped off my opinionated soap box.

Disclaimer: The statements above are strictly the opinion of the writer and
in no way reflect the opinion of this station.



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